December 2011
Well, we are coming to the end of a very eventful year. I wish I could say the year was filled with many joyful moments, but the sorrowful outnumbered the glad.
I need everyone to understand...our joy was never overshadowed by our circumstances. We found daily enjoyment in Christ even, especially, during the difficult times. The hard days would have been most unbearable without the mercies and grace supplied by our Christ. He never promised a smooth-sailing life, but a way through Him to sail through...
Our daily routines have not changed in months.
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June 29, 2013
I found this draft never finished or published, so I will sum up the past year and close this blog.
At the end of 2011, Mom had been in a nursing home for several months. I was mending from my fall earlier in the year and life was moving forward.
Looking back, I have to admit that mom never accepted her being in the nursing home. As much as she was deteriorating at our home, she just went down faster there. The nursing staff were caring and all who took care of her always had sweet words to say to her and about her.
I wanted her to be her old self and enter into making new friends and turning her room into her own.. but I have to keep telling myself she never did that here! I wanted her to make her bedroom her own, and she always had the attitude that she was just visiting and that any changes to her room had to be made by me, not her! I came to understand that it was not a choice for her to be "stubborn". It was her body defeating her.
I had to "let her go" to the Lord. I came to accept that in her silence, she and the Lord were having fellowship. She so loved Him and I believe she was enjoying His abiding even up to the time of her death.
With so many unspoken words, with hugs still to be given, with a kiss to her forehead and a whisper in her ear that I loved her and don't wait too long, the Lord was waiting, I said goodbye to my mother. She died a few hours later. It was May 16, 2012.
