Well, the social worker returned the next week, and what a "ditz". Everything she told me contradicted the information from the first visit. I was under the impression that she was going to initiate the needs and requests, but I was wrong. (and I don't say that often, so she must have given the impression that she would do it!)
I would have to call the Veterans Admin. in order to apply for the Widow's Mite and also to request the flag that should have been given when Daddy died. So, whoever wants it, give them a call. If you need daddy's social security number let me know, but I just don't have the time to start a new assignment.
I would also have to contact the Cancer Society to see if Mom could get Boost to drink. That also requires a doctor's Rx and proof that she has or had cancer. Another assignment I just don't have the energy to start. And since she does eat, I don't feel the need to access that service. So, for now, we are buying what she needs, and we have coupons to redeem.
The physical therapists stopped coming twice a week. Their purpose is for improvement of movement, and at the moment, Mom is doing as little moving as she can. She has refused to do the walking they require as proof that she is trying to improve, so their services have been terminated. She keeps making hints about the wheel chair, but I let her know that is not a good solution. She needs to walk!!! Yes, it hurts, but she needs to keep moving.
We still have the nurse and personal aide coming to take care of her back and give baths. We are going to the Wound Clinic every third week, and she seems to be doing very well. The doctor is pleased with her progress, and she has moved her into phase 2. (different meds for helping close the wound).
So for now, Mom is eating small amounts several times a day, and drinking lots of water and Boost. She spends a lot of time sleeping, but that is a side-effect of old age. She walks into the living room, sits in her chair for an hour or two, walks back to her room, and lays down. Her back is healing but her hip continues to pain her. Her body is in fairly good shape, but her mental abilities slow down daily. Conversations are non-existent. She makes a comment, but she does not need our response.
I used to feel sorry for nursing home residents. Why did the staff just allow them to "be". Now, taking care of an elderly person, I realize what else can you do? If they have trouble walking or hearing or seeing or understanding maybe they could compensate. But when they have all the above, what else can you do for them except care for them?
Both Harry and I have to remind ourselves daily that Mom is not able to do what we used to do with her or what she thinks she can do for herself. And although we want to do more for her, there just isn't more to be done. So we try not to worry about what we aren't doing with her, and find peace in what we can do for her.
Having said all that, early this morning when I got up to go to the bathroom, I peeked into her room. (I look in on her each time I get up just to make sure all is well. Lots of times, in the middle of the night, she is sitting on the side of her bed, but I don't go in. I just let her sit and then she will go back to bed eventually.) Anyway, when I peeked in, she was sitting on the floor!
As I was opening the door wider, she was starting to call me. I have no idea how long she had been on the floor. She said she had just slipped off the side of the bed. She said she didn't really fall, she slipped down with a soft plop! Yeah right, that is what she said about her bathroom fall.
She was very talkative. Adrenalin must have been flowing. It was in me! She went on and on about how she was fine, she was not hurt, etc etc. I had to wake Harry for his help in getting her up on her feet. I checked her back for scrapes and she was able to stand, so we let her go back to bed.
This morning, she was very awake and talkative. I wonder if she was putting on an act to stall me from calling 911? I gave her a pain pill after the fall (oh sorry, slip) and she was acting OK. As the day has gone on, she has done some complaining about her hip hurting her. And wanted a heating pad. I have been questioning her all day about any aches or pains. Her response has been negative, but she still says just her hip hurts as usual.
I told her earlier I was not waiting weeks before we see a doctor. We will be seeing him this coming week if needed. So she might as well tell me the truth about her aches and pains. She is now back in bed taking a nap.
Oops, spoke too soon. I hear her coming into the living room. So I guess I will see if she is hungry for dinner.
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