SHAME ON YOU!

Dear Family,

This will be the last automatically delivered Blog entry. I will still be writing in this journal, but I will not be sending them out. If you want to see what I write, I guess you will have to save this web site.

When I say Mom cries all the time, I really mean all the time. If she is awake, she is tearful, sobbing quietly, or outright weeping! She cries out to the Lord "why do You keep me here in so much pain? I should not have lived this long. What's the point of being alive when I can't move without pain!" Scary words for me to listen to...

When the pain pills are at their peak, she is "normal" and talks, well...tells stories that all I have to do is listen. She doesn't want or need any participation from me. And this morning finally, finally, finally she spoke out loud what I have had in my heart for the past two years.

After a rough, painful morning, she was crying for all the "babies" she hadn't seen in so long. When I said she sees them, she said "No, they don't come to see me and I can't go to them," and she said it in anger! So I told her she needed to speak that feeling to her children and she said "No, you know that's not the way I am."

But I am that way, so here it is. Shame on you all! There is no family member without a cell phone. A cell phone that can call anywhere in the United States...but do those cell phones call this house to speak to your mother, grandmother, great grandmother? NO! I have requested over the past two years for you to call on your way to where-ever is more important than here. Mom does not need long conversations; she can't keep up. She just wants to hear the voice of one of her loved ones. How hard can that be to honor that need? Shame on you.

She's the momma. She should not have to be the one to call you! Every one of you (except the good one, Joe, who calls three times a week) should be ashamed of yourselves. So what if you have busy lives. I bet you carve out time to watch TV, go drinking and seeing friends, drive to other cities to see friends and family (more important than your mother/grandmother?), go to a movie, go shopping, etc. etc.

I counted the family members that live here in Baton Rouge. Mike, Sally, Lisa; Laurie, Brent Sr, Mearidith, Kyle; Deanna, Meegan, Heather, and all the additional babies. Also there are family members that come into town, but rarely make it over here to say hi. Shame on you.

I feel like an only child...no one offers to visit long enough for me to take a break, go out with my husband, take a nap, take a walk out in the sun. Whatever! No one offers to pick Mom up for an evening at their house. There is always an excuse...shame on you!

My children allow me to get out on occasion. Melissa or Stephanie will keep watch for me to get out, but what about all the rest of the family? You know, it really isn't about me getting out. I am a home body at heart. I enjoy puttering around the house. I don't need to walk the mall, or go out shopping, etc. So forget about me. Think about your mom/grandmother. She needs to know she is still remembered, loved, and thought of.

I have talked to the Lord about this a lot. I have wanted to speak out for so long. But I must admit, the Lord did not give me the sense that I should speak before now. I feel He has released me to speak, so I will. But this will be the last time I say anything. Some of you will be highly offended. Too bad! Some of you will miss the chance to say "I love you, Mom/Grandma/Granny." How sad!

Go back over some of my old entries and realize how fast Mom is losing ground and then maybe she will get some phone calls from somebody...

This entry is mainly for her children. I realize grandchildren might not have close ties with the grandparent but maybe some of you might want to speak to her before you lose her forever...think about it...

Oh, and by the way, this is not for a one-time phone call. If you are moved by this entry remember she needs contact often. Surely family members in town can come by more than once a month.

I have been (jokingly, with a laugh, most likely really mean it) accused of being bossy and opinionated...well, so be it. Call your mother/grandmother or my opinion of loving family members will be adjusted accordingly.

Like I said, I feel the Lord released me to say these things now. Maybe there is a reason He is letting me speak....